Sometimes while I’m running, I have to look over my shoulder. That paranoia crawls up my body. It’s like a leech. Buried in my skin. So quick I don’t notice.

I’m a deer. Weak, frail, timid. I’m running for my survival.
I had been alone and cautious because a hunter had shot me with a bow and arrow. It pierced me in the chest, just inches from my heart. Somehow, I escaped.
I stumbled into the forest, determined to be alone. The wound had greatly weakened me. I was bleeding all over the forest because the arrow was still lodged in my chest.
A buck came out from behind a tree. He assisted in removing the arrow. He said, “I would never hurt you. You’re too weak and small, my dear.” He told me he would protect me from the dangers in the woods.
I was skeptical at first. With all the dark creatures lurking in the forest, is it wise to trust a strange buck?
The sun was falling steadily. I had to make a decision soon. My survival depended on it. I could continue my journey alone, awake all night and on the alert, or I could travel with this buck.
I went against my better judgement and followed his lead. We traveled into the depths of the woods, and I could see nothing.
For two years, I was blind. We traveled through the woods, and usually at night. This buck was nocturnal, always telling me, “Just trust me. I won’t stray you in the wrong direction, my dear.” So I followed.
I have poor eyesight. When alone, I travel during the daylight hours. I stop at the edge of the woods, but don’t venture into the clearing. The open space is risky. I prefer the safety of the trees.
As a frail, weak female, it was perhaps wise to travel with the young buck. For the two years of our time in the trees together, I found it peculiar that we only began our ventures when the sun fell. I spoke up at times. Meekly, but I still voiced my concerns. His answers always left lingering questions that I kept in my head. Sometimes the questions traveled to my tongue, but I swallowed them.
During the day, the buck and I were lazy together. At first it felt comfortable. While alone I had to always be on the alert, but with him, I relaxed. I got too comfortable.
Over the course of our time living in the woods together, his actions gave me more questions that swam in my head. After two years, I was a nervous wreck. Not only was I weak and frail, but he was convinced I was dumb and incapable of living without fear. I questioned his every move, and rightly so.
The buck was concealing his true identity. The questions were building because my instincts told me to get out. But his charm trapped me to his side. I was enslaved, weighed down by the hopes that I was worthy of him.
Leading up to the horrific event, I should have known. The buck has assisted in helping me when I’d been bleeding all over the summer leaves. He caught me when I was vulnerable, almost begging for someone to take me. To at least pretend he cared. This buck was the best pretender. However, I swatted the questions away like flies.
After two years, the buck and I were in shambles. I was too weak and frail to keep up with him during our nightly journeys through the woods. My eyesight worsened, and it made me nervous. We were on the lookout for hunters in their orange attire, but I could only see a few feet ahead of me.
The buck, once charming, now was frustrated. I weighed him down and I knew it. I was a risk to travel with, day or night.
We both knew we could not go on. We were dead together, before the hunters had even shot us. The buck and I decided that we would part at the edge of the woods, and I would venture into the field for the first time in two years.
He led the way, like he always had. I was too blind in the trees to realize this would be the sign before the attack.
The buck I had been chained to for two years was secretly disguised as a hunter. He raised his gun and pointed it between my eyes.
“I’m sorry, dear,” he said. “I love you.”
He looked me in the eyes. His blue eyes. They looked different now. His eyes used to be so clear. Now I saw only a stranger in front of me. Had I really been that blind? Why hadn’t I run when I had the chance, before the night draped over the both of us?
As the hunter stood poised with his shotgun, I knew there was nothing I could say that would convince him to lower the gun and let me go. For two years, he’d been after my flesh. He led me right into his trap.
He shot his bullet straight through my head. My brains spilled all over the melted snow and mud as I ran out. I’ve been running ever since, leaving a dark red trail.
I ran out of the woods, my skinny legs shaking. My head is spinning from the blood loss. How am I alive?
I’m still looking over my shoulder as I run. My eyesight is slowly returning. I don’t sleep at night. But the paranoia is still buried in my skin. I cannot stop running for anyone. One more arrow, one more bullet, one wrong move, and I could be a lifeless carcass buried deep in the woods or eaten by a family of hunters.
I’m safer alone.
Reblogged this on Wade Lancaster.
Thank you for the reblog! 🙂
You are very welcome. I truly appreciate your work Rebecca. 😊
I’m glad to hear that. I appreciate it. 🙂
…safer alone. Ain’t that the truth
Fantastic!
Thank you! 🙂
Safer while you heal. Forever? Probably not.
That’s probably true.
Your writing shows that you are a strong, insightful woman; so I would guess that the healing will be quicker rather than slower.
Thank you! I appreciate that. I’m thinking the healing will be fairly quick as well. Taking it one day at a time. 🙂
How beautifully written and touching.
Thank you! Glad you enjoyed it. 🙂
My first instinct it to say “poor Becky”, but then I realize that the fact that you wrote a post with such powerful imagery means you’re not weak at all. Well done, Becky. 🙂
Thank you so much, Austin! I’m glad you liked it. 🙂
I don’t like you thinking of yourself as a wounded doe, though…
I know what you mean. The piece ended up being slightly depressing. Oh well. It started out as something that wasn’t remotely related to deer and hunters. It was just about running. Then it took a different direction. I’m still writing the one about writing though.
It was still very powerful. All that matters, though, is what you think of yourself. If you are a deer, you are a young, healthy, beautiful one. From what I can tell…
Thank you. You’re completely right. I’m better about how I view myself. I’m starting to believe those things, too.
Look at you, being all positive and self-confident. I like that look on you. 😉
Thanks! I like it, too. 🙂
Who knew you could get even more amazing? 😉
Well thank you! 🙂
I should be thanking you. You’ve made my life a lot nicer. We seem to be good for each other…
I’m glad that I’ve made your life nicer. Yes we do seem to be. 🙂
It is always nice when someone new walks into your life and makes it better. Makes me never give up hope. 🙂
I agree, and I’m glad you’re not going to give up. 🙂
Not when people like the girl from my dream the other night are walking into my life. I’d never give up on that…
Good! I’m glad to hear you won’t give up. 🙂
I’m not a quitter. Even though I wrote The Retirement Party, which was about my decision to retire from dating. 🙂
Nice! You retired from dating, and I wrote about losing the dating game. We’re both quitters (temporarily of course). 🙂
Sometimes, you have to step away from the game to realize how to master it again. 🙂
Exactly! That’s my game plan right now.
This is a good time for self growth. Concentrate on Becky and then unleash her on the world when you’re ready. 🙂
Yes it is. I’m working on it, and I’m staying focused. 🙂
That’s what’s important. Just do what’s best for you. I read somewhere that baking cookies is excellent for self growth. 😉
Oh I bet you did. 🙂
I will send you the article just as soon as I put my hands on it again… 🙂
Sounds like a plan!
I’m going to find that article. It’s here somewhere! 😛
I’m sure it is
I’m going to have to have the interns find it. In the meantime, you should heat the oven and prepare the cookie batter. 😛
Oh sure, I’ll get right on that. 😉
Excellent. I love when you agree with me. 🙂
Of course you do. 🙂
You’re turning that around to make it seem like that was what you intended the whole time! 😛
Am I really? 🙂
Yes, smart ass, you are!
Hey!
No need to yell. You always have my attention. How can I help you, Miss Becky? 😛
Now who’s the smart ass? 🙂
Maybe it’s me. I’m not quite sure. What do you think?
Maybe it is you. Or neither of us.
I am so confused right now. You seem to have that effect on me for some reason. 😉
Uh oh!
I think you happen to like it! 😛
You think so, huh?
Oh, I pretty much know so. 😛
😛
There you go sticking out your tongue at me again. That is going to lead to trouble one of these days… 😉
Oh no!
I think you might not mind that kind of trouble. 😉
Really?
Yes. That is my Deep Thought on that matter. 😉
*Running
Running with a star. Hmmm…what should I make of that coded message? :p
Ahaha, it’s editing code. 😉 I had to fix my comment were I’d meant to say I was still writing about running.
I know, goofball, but since that comment appeared first in my reader, it looked like secret code. I was just being hilarious and making you smile again. 🙂
Nice! Well you did make me smile. 🙂 Maybe it is code!
I’m glad it made you smile. Some days, you need smiles more than others, right?
That’s true. Everyone needs that sometimes.
Yes, and it’s nice to have people in your life who can give that to you…
It’s very nice. 🙂
And here I was feeling all alone at The House on the Hill. 🙂
You don’t need to feel alone. 🙂
Not with you around keeping me company with your witty blog comments. 🙂
Good! And thank you. 🙂
You’re welcome. It’s such a beautiful day here, and I’m in a wonderful mood. So, I’m even nicer than usual. Lucky you. 😉
Yes, lucky me. 🙂
Sweetest girl I know, Miss Becky. Awww…. 🙂
Awww! 🙂
Goodness, aren’t we just so darn adorable?
We are!
I am so glad you agree. I’m sure it makes others sick because we’re so darn cute, but I don’t care! 🙂
I don’t either! 🙂
Good. Great minds think alike. 😉
Yes they do!
We’re like two peas in a pod. 🙂
We definitely are!
Then why do we have to be so far apart? That just doesn’t seem fair!
It doesn’t seem fair at all!
No, but there are always airplanes and cars…
Very true.
I only live ten minutes from the airport. Quite easy to pick up a visitor… 🙂
That’s quite convenient!
Well, it wasn’t planned. Just ended up that way. But yeah, just let me know if I ever have to go get you. 🙂
I’ll let you know. 🙂
I know you will, you won’t want to walk from the airport, silly. 😉
Of course not!
Although it would be excellent exercise. Maybe Stephen King would see you walking and offer you a ride. 😉
Ah, that would be exciting!
He’s never offered me a ride, but I bet he would stop for you…
Maybe he would. Who knows. 🙂
Did you see the April Fool’s Day joke Stephen King pulled on the internet today? He posted that he was going to be writing some episodes of The Walking Dead next season…
Oh my gosh, that’s funny!
Us Maine writers do have a great sense of humor. 🙂
And a self-serving ‘buck’ deservedly skewered by the pen. Well done.
Definitely! Thank you. 🙂
Reblogged this on K. L. Romo and commented:
Beautiful imagery.